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1) Argh! Why can't you tell a semicolon from a colon? Why?!? Did your mother drop you as a child? What the hell?
2) I don't care if George Orwell started off every sentence with a conjunction. You are not Orwell. But you think you are. But you're not. And you need to stop. Before I kill you.
3) Sometimes even the most clever turn of phrase just does not have a point and should be cut. Like, say, this one. *snip* See how much better that is?
4) Don't italicize Wal-Mart. In fact, don't use Wal-Mart unless you're staging a major adventure scene there, somewhere between Electronics and Housewares. Oh wait, you're not? Okay. *snip* There. All better.
5) You know that saying, "a bridge too far?" Well, your version is "a phrase/clause too far." Please, for the love of Gertrude, just... stop.
2) I don't care if George Orwell started off every sentence with a conjunction. You are not Orwell. But you think you are. But you're not. And you need to stop. Before I kill you.
3) Sometimes even the most clever turn of phrase just does not have a point and should be cut. Like, say, this one. *snip* See how much better that is?
4) Don't italicize Wal-Mart. In fact, don't use Wal-Mart unless you're staging a major adventure scene there, somewhere between Electronics and Housewares. Oh wait, you're not? Okay. *snip* There. All better.
5) You know that saying, "a bridge too far?" Well, your version is "a phrase/clause too far." Please, for the love of Gertrude, just... stop.
