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This morning I took him in for his first real "let's get it started" appointment with the orthodontist. He stuck metal bands on a couple of his back teeth in preparation for the headgear that will be coming, and then braces on his front four teeth to get them a little straighter before things move to the next stage. Next month he gets his bottom baby canine teeth removed so that there'll be room to maneuver things around before his permanent ones come in. All told, he'll be in this stage of braces for roughly 18 months.
All things considered, it wasn't that bad. It didn't hurt him -- the worst thing he had to put up with was the bad taste when they prepped the teeth for the brackets. I know having the teeth pulled is coming, though, and the full set of lower braces, and the headgear, and... it's just killing me. I feel like I'm letting people torture my son, and while I know it's for a good purpose, seeing metal in his mouth just about kills me.
Part of this is probably because I never had braces. I could have used them, actually, and I've considered getting them someday as an adult, but it just wasn't on the radar when my brother and I were kids. My parents were self-employed and didn't make a ton of money as it was. Neither of us had egregious problems, so no braces for us, no how. I don't remember it ever even being considered. As a teenager, I rejoiced in this. Now, of course, I find myself less certain.
I spent a lot of time thinking about this today, while I was watching Al sit in the chair and play with the suction tube (his orthodontist is cool). I have a friend who's hugely picky about the teeth of the people she dates; it's a major thing for her. I didn't really get this until today. She had braces. And then I got to thinking... how much do we judge people based on this?
It seems to me that straight teeth is one of those telling socioeconomic pointers that we don't really discuss, but it factors in. If you had braces as a child, you will be perceived as an adult as coming from a more successful, affluent background -- and honestly, in the US that's probably got a bit of truth to it. It's one of those "fitting in" things that can subtly affect how people treat you, how easy it is to interview for a given job, how your peer group sees you.... Not to say that straight teeth makes you a "better person," or that crooked teeth damn you for all time, but people do pay attention to that, don't they?
I'm going to get it done for the kids as they need it, and most likely they'll both get it for a while, sooner or later. I just find it odd to think how we develop our own tells -- not to mention wondering if I'm contributing to my kid's success in finding a mate one of these days, or getting into the school he wants or the job he would love.
And so I am complicit in the torture of my child. Some days, parenting sucks.
All things considered, it wasn't that bad. It didn't hurt him -- the worst thing he had to put up with was the bad taste when they prepped the teeth for the brackets. I know having the teeth pulled is coming, though, and the full set of lower braces, and the headgear, and... it's just killing me. I feel like I'm letting people torture my son, and while I know it's for a good purpose, seeing metal in his mouth just about kills me.
Part of this is probably because I never had braces. I could have used them, actually, and I've considered getting them someday as an adult, but it just wasn't on the radar when my brother and I were kids. My parents were self-employed and didn't make a ton of money as it was. Neither of us had egregious problems, so no braces for us, no how. I don't remember it ever even being considered. As a teenager, I rejoiced in this. Now, of course, I find myself less certain.
I spent a lot of time thinking about this today, while I was watching Al sit in the chair and play with the suction tube (his orthodontist is cool). I have a friend who's hugely picky about the teeth of the people she dates; it's a major thing for her. I didn't really get this until today. She had braces. And then I got to thinking... how much do we judge people based on this?
It seems to me that straight teeth is one of those telling socioeconomic pointers that we don't really discuss, but it factors in. If you had braces as a child, you will be perceived as an adult as coming from a more successful, affluent background -- and honestly, in the US that's probably got a bit of truth to it. It's one of those "fitting in" things that can subtly affect how people treat you, how easy it is to interview for a given job, how your peer group sees you.... Not to say that straight teeth makes you a "better person," or that crooked teeth damn you for all time, but people do pay attention to that, don't they?
I'm going to get it done for the kids as they need it, and most likely they'll both get it for a while, sooner or later. I just find it odd to think how we develop our own tells -- not to mention wondering if I'm contributing to my kid's success in finding a mate one of these days, or getting into the school he wants or the job he would love.
And so I am complicit in the torture of my child. Some days, parenting sucks.
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no subject
Date: 2007-02-21 07:38 pm (UTC)From:Anyhow, since my younger brother had come with us, my mom asked to have him looked at, and guess who ended up with the braces!
I do see some personal ads where they talk about wanting someone with straight teeth or good teeth, etc. Ah well. I really hope to find a person who isn't so focused on such things!
no subject
Date: 2007-02-22 03:33 am (UTC)From:Just once, though. In self defense.
Honest.
...what?