Recipe for life by an 8-yr-old boy.

Take one 8-yr-old boy in good condition. Wind him up during the day with a trip to the bread factory. Remove from factory one souvenir cap, one hairnet, and one mini-loaf of white bread (with the company's compliments). Upon return from the factory, put boy in car and drive to Taco Time. Feed boy one Taco Time Jr. Soft Taco, with tater tots and crispitos (!?!)*. Boy is now fueled and rarin' to go.

As boy, upon re-entering the car on the way to elder brother's therapy session, spot bread. Note to self that boy is ESPECIALLY fond of fresh bread. Eat entire loaf of mini bread in one sitting when mom isn't looking. Upon arrival, run around LOTS.

Time passes.

Bread expands.


Upon arrival home, go play quietly in room. Roughly an hour and 1/2 later, emerge, stating "My tummy does not feel so good." Go to the bathroom and complain when mom gives you two chewable kid's Pepto tablets. Take them anyway. Upon attempting to take them, note that bubble gum is not a pleasant flavor.

Yarf.

Following yarfing, note that tummy feels much better and head off cheerfully to bed, hugging your bemused mother as you pass by. Ask for lullabye while hugging teddy bear. Sleep.

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*Note: I will never so long as I live understand the place that is Taco Time. I would not have thought it possible to get Mexican food wrong in any more Anglo way than Taco Bell, and yet there it is! Tater tots. Ranch dressing on tacos. I am astounded.

Ganked from Elissa.

If I were a stone, I would be... a geode.
If I were a tree, I would be a... cherry tree.
If I were a bird, I would be a... kestrel.
If I were an insect, I would be a... dragonfly.
If I were a machine, I would be a... threat to humanity, or possibly a washing machine, or maybe a slightly out of date personal computer.
If I were a tool, I would be a... pen.
If I were a fruit, I would be a... cherry.
If I were a flower, I would be a... tulip, or possibly one of those mini roses.
If I were a kind of weather, I would be... the calm before the storm.
If I were a mythical creature, I would be a... mermaid.
If I were a musical instrument, I would be a... piano.
If I were a kind of profession, I would be... an artist.
If I were an animal, I would be a... dog. I wish I could say a wolf, but probably a dog.
If I were anything in the world, I would be... loved.
If I were a color, I would be... amythyst purple or ruby red.
If I were a fragrance, I would be… wisteria and cherry blossoms.
If I were an emotion, I would be... confused, as I have no frickin' idea.
If I were a state or feeling, I would be... centered.
If I were a sound, I would be... tolling bells.
If I were an Element, I would be... Hmm. Not fire. Not really earth, either. I think I have to go with water, maybe with a little air. So.... bubbles. :)