eurydicebound

... sometimes it hits me that I am apparently doomed to never have all the people or things I love in the same place. To get something, I give something else up. Without wanting to change what I have, then, there are things I miss. Not counting my children, of course -- I never don't miss them.

I miss Native Americans and people having any awareness of Native Americans as more than some hokey New Age hippie philosophy.

I miss real coffee shops, enough of them that no matter where I was, I knew I didn't have to look far to find a quiet place to sit for a moment that WASN'T a Panera. There are some out here, but not enough of them, and the non-Panera closest to me that isn't a chain has plastic stackable lawn chairs for seating.

I miss Asian Art being a regular thing.

I miss the crazy red floor in the main library, and the awesome typographical floor in front of the main counter.

I miss the John Singer Sargent piece in the Seattle Art Museum.

I miss mountains.

I miss good teriyaki.

I miss ocean. Lake Erie tries, but it isn't the same. I don't know why that is.

I miss sculpture gardens.

I miss crazy Seattle people.

I miss Capitol Hill.

I miss Geraldine's and the Columbia City Ale House.

I miss the Columbia City Farmer's Market.

I miss the Columbia City Theater.

I miss that pie store I went to with Phil & Sarah & Matt last time we were in town.

I miss Bad Woman Yarn, and the Pelican across the street, and Drunken Goat Gelato down the way, next to the sock store. I miss gelato.

I miss the statue of Lenin, and the troll.

I miss cherry blossoms on the quad.

I miss the mini cedar forest in Kubota Gardens.

I miss that awareness of the land and water and sky that seems so foreign out here, as though everything will always be enough, and we don't really need to do anything about it.

I miss looking around and seeing more faces that don't look like mine (CWRU helps with this, actually).

I miss car trips to Olympia Cards and Comics and getting to have lunch with Eric and Gabi (when she could break away).

I miss knitting with Misty.

I miss taking Rosie over to Nicole and Chris's place and getting to visit with them.

I miss going over to Phil's and gaming and watching movies and talking until wee hours of the morning.

I miss soy milk being a given.

I miss Folklife.

I miss the Cinerama.

I miss living in a solidly blue part of a state.

I miss Seattle, for all of its crazy, expensive downsides and social issues that would make it nearly impossible for me to actually live there again.

And now I must finish my exam.

Well, of philosophy, anyway. Assuming I don't screw up. :) I got accepted to the program at Case! I get to start next fall as a PhD student!

I got the email last night, read it, managed not to scream (as Matt had been watching a few straight hours of Dexter), came out of the bedroom, and basically launched myself at him making squeeing noises. Then I told him. :)

Oh... so full of happy and trepidation all at the same time. And now I must go back to studying.

So, I didn't count points yesterday because Oscars and I realized last night I'd forgotten to take my blood pressure pills for a couple of days, so I'm retaining water. I figured this out when I realized my fingers were swollen and my wedding ring was suddenly a PITA to remove. I took a pill, naturally, but it didn't fix everything. Oh, and something from yesterday's meal made the water retention worse--possibly the alcohol. I didn't have much, but I did have some. This together means I'm taking the scale measurement from Friday that I took, rather than weighing myself this morning.

On the upside, I'm at 225 even. That means I'm down 3.8 lbs from where I started when counting points. That's a little more than a month ago. On the one hand, I feel kinda disheartened about not having lost more, but given that it's my last semester and it's been stressful enough to throw off my cycle, AND I haven't been altogether successful in getting rid of soda... well, it could be worse. And what's more to the point, my high weight was actually about 236 before Christmas, which means that I've lost over 10 lbs since I started trying to take care of it. I've also lost about 1 1/2 inches off my waist since I started measuring. I've lost enough now that people are starting to see it and comment on it.

If I lose 2-3 lbs a month... well, it's not as good as it could be, but it's still loss. It just sorta makes me confront that it's slow right now... especially as I'm not making it to the gym. Spring break is the week after my test. I'll go then, and maybe some during my test as well.

Observation 1: studying for the MA exam means eating out more, which means my diet goes to hell.
Observation 2: I'm going to go back and plot a graph of my soda consumption and see if I can spot patterns.

2/26--Oscars party: no points counted except as a general guideline. Banked points reset to 0, because really.

2/25
Points: 37
Banked: 5

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2/15
points: 29
banked: -1

breakfast: 3
toast & butter

Lunch: 10
sandwich 7, chips 3

snack 3

dinner 10
soda 3

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Points: 29
Banked: 5

breakfast 3
cereal and soymilk

lunch 11
bread 4, egg 2, cheese 3, bacon 3

chips 4

dinner: 9
eggplant parmesan 3
bread 1
sausage 2
soda 3

popsicle 2

What have I been eating in the days between 2/5 and 2/9? Well, I've mostly stayed on point, but I've also been bad, and honestly I wasn't tracking as much as I should have been. It is safest to assume that I don't have any banked, but that I also didn't go over by a huge amount since I was trying to track in my head over those days. Also, my period is coming up, which throws my food consumption into a tizzy. That's okay, though, because it's time to get reacquainted with the horse again.

Points: 31
Banked: 0

Breakfast: 3
yogurt, coffee

Snack: 1
banana

Lunch: 10
openface turkey & munster bbq sandwich, tomato soup

Snack: 3
cherry tomatoes, triscuits, cheese

Dinner: 14
chicken pad see ew, tuna & avocado maki (1/2), salmon maki (1/2), tea & water

2/2:
Points: 25
Banked: 13

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So. On our way Friday to a double feature of Oscar movies, just Matt and I, when the bad thing happened. Cars in front of us slowed suddenly, Matt tried to stop but we went into a skid--and once the tires touched the snow-covered grass on the side of the road we went into a spin and there was nothing for it. We ended up smashing the back of the car into a tree after making a lovely set of tiremarks on the side of the road. We're both okay, but I fear Esmerelda is done for -- her wheel was bent a bit, her back passenger quarterpanel is smushed in, the trunk won't open/close right and the passenger side door won't open. Given that she's a 2001, they might repair her, but it's doubtful. I will probably have to get a new car and, given current finances, can't afford a car payment to go with it, so it'll be a car that costs whatever the settlement will give me. I would really just prefer they'd fix her, but I know that's not always the way things go. The blue book value on her is good, though, so maybe it'll be all right yet.

As for the humans, Matt was a bit sore for a day or so, but seems fine now. I'm pretty sore and stiff on my neck and the bump on my head is slowly decreasing, but no other ill effects were noted. As to the rest, we'll see what this week brings.

Points: 27
Banked: 10

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